Thursday, June 23, 2005

Saskatchewan License Plates

O.K., alot of you might remember a few years back when SGI had a contest for what the slogan on Saskatchewan's license plate should be. AND, as most of you know, the winning slogan was "Land of the Living Skies". I am gonna go out on a limb here and say that slogan blows. I GUARANTEE that had I been the guy in charge of deciding which slogan would appear on our license plate, Saskatchewan wouldn't be the laughing stock of Canada right now. I actually submitted a few slogan ideas of my own, which, for some reason, didn't make the cut. Here they are.

"Saskatchewan - Land of the Living Old" - I don't know what the ACTUAL stats are on the population of Saskatchewan, but I would be willing to guess that for every person under the age of 30, there are 10 people over the age of 100. I mean, I think we have entire towns dedicated to super old people. In fact, I KNOW we have entire towns dedicated to old people. Just look at places like Weyburn. Weyburn is such a crap-hole and everyone from Weyburn stinks like old people or tries to steal your girlfriend. Even the 17 young people who live there stink like old people because there are so many old people, that old people smell permeates the air.

"Saskatchewan - Flatter Than Your 12-Year-Old Daughter" - Before people start cracking off retarded comments like "but lbomb u r not supozed to say stuf lik that. u sound lik mikal jaksin, LOLOL!!", I would just like to say I don't care what you think. Fact of the matter is, it's true. Your 12 year old daughter is flat...probably. Saskatchewan is flat...for sure.

"Saskatchewan - Impoverished since 1904" - This must be true. Why else do you think we pay 13% tax? Why else do you think we haven't planted trees everywhere? Why else don't we build some hills? Have you ever been to anything cool in Saskatchewan? Ever? Of course not. They don't even have Rock in the Valley anymore. They have Country Music in my throw up. What? I'm tired, be quiet.

"Saskatchewan - Home of Leslie Nielson" - Is anyone tired of hearing about this guy? Dude comes out with a couple sub-par movies and all of a sudden he's the best thing to come out of Regina. Or Carlyle. Or Tisdale. Or whatever. And it's not just Leslie, it's Theresa Sokyrka (I hope I spelled her name wrong) and The Johner Brothers and Theoren Fleury and whoever else. Lets just admit it, we're grasping at straws here. If we had Jim Carrey, Avril Lavigne, Toby MacGuire (or whoever a good country singer is), and Peter Forsberg, at least we'd have something.

"Saskatchewan - That Place Between Winnipeg and Calgary" - If you're travelling across Canada, what is the place you're most likely to pass by without stopping? If you say anything other than Saskatchewan, you are a liar. What are you going to stop and see? Taylor Field? Boundary Dam? We need something to draw tourists. Like a swimming pool or something.

81 Comments:

At 10:30 AM, Blogger Brian Anthony said...

Saskatchewan- Land of a million flies...atleast. Seriously, went to camp out here and was sitting around insinde(you know a place with walls and windows, doors ect.) i noticed a discoloration consuming most of the wall, i was thinking that's a terrible paint job. I look again, that's not a paint job, it's only about 30,000 fish flies. Awesome.


hmmm how about Sask. Land of the Prying Eyes.....is it just me or is everyone in the province just really freaking nosey.

Saskatchewan........Seriously, we are too a real Canadian province.

Saskatchewan........even Manitoba kicks our ass

Saskatchewan.......well atleast our insurance is cheap.

Saskatchewan.........should'nt that just read "Road Closed"



bri

 
At 3:01 PM, Blogger Brian Anthony said...

Luke,

Got the job, leaving in fourteenish hours, it was awesome living with/off you the last two monthsish. ........gotta go pack and clean (read play xbox as much as possible before i go)

 
At 10:51 PM, Blogger Jenner said...

we actually pay 14% taxes... but don't worry it goes to good causes, like research on how cow farts are affecting the ozone layer... but seriously..I wish I was kidding.

 
At 10:51 PM, Blogger Jenner said...

ps. I like saskatchewan.

 
At 12:50 AM, Blogger CrazyNess said...

You don't know me, and you don't even know the person who knows your friend who knows you (what?) but I'm leaving a comment because someone that I know told me about your blog and said it's really funny and awesome. And it is.
"I'll be back."
Which is on MY list of things that aren't cool to say.

 
At 9:16 PM, Blogger LBomb said...

Thats a good saying to have on your list. Along with "Show me the money" and "Eat my shorts".

 
At 12:11 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

HI, I WOULD JUST LIKETO POINT OUT THAT THERON FLEURY COMES FROM RUSELL MANITOBA

 
At 1:12 AM, Blogger LBomb said...

You don't have to yell.

 
At 12:44 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hahahaha!!!!! you guys are all messed!!!! (i would use a different word there...but shouldn't!!) i've lived everywhere except ontario and personally i do believe saskatchewan isn't the greatest place on earth BUT....

alberta is nothing but crack hoes and people who think they are too rich to live anywhere else (go ahead and shove that money up your nose!!)

BC....whoppie we got mountains and that's about it!!! oh and don't forget the ogopogo....how much dope did those retards smoke that they claim to have seen a monster in the lake!!!!

Manitoba...so far my favorite....BUT...is everyone mentally insane??!! either trying to kill themselves or someone else just for the hell of it!!! mind you i would kill myself too if all i had to look forward to was a welfare check!!!!!

....i think i might move to ontario!!!!

 
At 1:05 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

no actually theo is from saskatchewan...his brothers grew up in russell, but theo didn't actually spend much time here...he's been on the move with hockey from a very young age

i can't think now the name of the town he's from...but it's also where his wife jen is from

 
At 1:07 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

oxbow, sask. ????? does that sound right???

 
At 1:25 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

LBomb, what a loser. Sask is not flat, you obviously have not seen all of Saskatchewan have you. Especially not northern saskatchewan. And we have plenty of swimming pools, not that we really need them because there are so many lakes. If it wasn't for Alberta's mountains (which are beautiful) their land would be the same as ours. And B.C. is beautiful except for Vancouver's Down Town Eastside, now that is something to be proud of... NOT

 
At 1:31 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

P.S. By the way it's "Land of Living Skies" there is no 'the' in it. Are you sure your from here?

 
At 12:24 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!

 
At 11:59 AM, Anonymous -sunnirae- said...

I live in SK, I've lived in BC, but I came back, gotta say, I still like Sask better. :)

I do think it stems down to each their own... Two beautiful provinces in their own ways, I love the openness, and yes, I don't mind that I can see my dog run away for days, but the skies in the north are beautiful. :)

 
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