Thursday, December 07, 2006

Cassie Madden

Cassie Campbell is the John Madden of NHL broadcasting. Except, somehow, worse. For YEARS people have been making fun of the obvious color commentary that Madden provides. I think Brian Regan put it best when he said:

"Al Michaels - To the 20, to the 10, there's a flag on the play...

John Madden - Now if-a if-a if-a there's a flag on the play, there's gonna be a penalty. If a guy runs, he goes faster. If a guy eats alot, he takes a big dump later. Tough actin' Tanactin."

Ok, maybe you didn't get that. In fact, GUARANTEED you didn't get that if you aren't a sports fan. But all of this is irrelevant. As bad as John Madden is, Cassie Campbell (the captain of the Canadian Olympic Womens Hockey team) is far worse.

CBC tried it's luck with her right there in the broadcasting booth doing color commentary. The thing is, she's an idiot. Even if you have never watched hockey in your entire life, you could do a better commentary than she did. The type of garbage that came out of her mouth were things like this:

"Great pass through the neutral zone" or "The new NHL sure has alot of scoring" or "Phaneuf has a nice ass".

So CBC fired her. Or so I thought. I caught her on HNIC (Hockey Night In Canada) this last weekend when my beloved Canadiens beat the Prostitutes...I mean Leafs, in a shootout. She wasn't doing color commentary. She was, instead, doing rinkside commentary. Once again, she ceased to amaze me with her awful.

CBC, if Ron McLean sucked at his job or if Don Cherry didn't bring in the viewers every week, would you keep them on the payroll? No. So why do you continue to embarrass yourself with clips of Cassie Campbell stating the obvious? To gain female viewers? Guess what. Wrong demographic.

Cassie Campbell makes me almost as sick as Hayley Wickenheiser and her Hamburger Helper commercials.

This will be the last post I ever do about a woman sucking at a man's job. NOT.

Counters Rule